By: Curtis Baker
At the end of our discussion last week, we raised the question of how we can affect change in others who do things that we know to be wrong. In the first six verses of Matthew 7, Jesus has already instructed us that being judgmental will not do the trick. Being judgmental towards others only brings their judgment back upon you, and few of us live such good lives that there couldn’t be some point of counter attack. So judgment will not work. Along with that, using the allusion of throwing pearls before swine, Jesus also instructs us to see that forcing our unwanted “helpful pieces of advice” also are usually not very affective in changing behavior. So if both of these common means are ruled out in our dealing with others, how can we bring change where we know change needs to come?
Well, first, we must acknowledge that there is likely just as much change that needs to be realized in our life. It is easy to see the speck of dust in someone else’s eye while completely ignoring the huge log sticking out of our own. It makes us feel far better to look at other people’s problems than it does our own. But assuming that our motives are right, and that we are genuinely concerned for another whose behavior needs to change, Jesus tells us in verses 7-11 how that can be done. The answer is the art of the “request.”
Jesus tells us to “Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you shall find; knock, and the door shall be open unto you.” Generally, we assume that he must be talking about asking God, and that is certainly correct, but it speaks firstly to how we deal with one another. Haven’t you ever noticed the power of a request? Being judgmental will only get you judgment in return, but if you request someone to consider something, often times the power of the request will accomplish this. That is why people hate being asked to volunteer for something. The power of the request makes it hard for them to say no. Whereas, if you tried to command someone to do it, they would likely spit in your face.
The request is powerful because it respects the dignity of the other person. Whereas judgment and unwanted advice can feel like an unwanted violation, even a manipulation, a request allows the person the dignity of saying yes or no. That is the dignity God has given each one of us, and that is precisely the point. As Jesus says at the end of this section, “do unto others as you would have them do unto you.” This statement sums up all that the Bible has to say.
But requesting of one another is not our only resource in this regard. As was stated earlier, these few verses also teach us about asking God. Prayer, in many ways, is about making requests of God, both in consideration of ourselves, and of others. If we see others participating in harmful actions that we know need to be changed, our first avenue of action should be to request that our heavenly Father would look after this person in a special way. After all, God knows best how to bring about change in others. Most of our attempts are pitiful at best. But if we, as partially evil human beings, know how to handle our children’s requests with love and generosity, how much more so does God take our requests to heart and provide what is needed for us and others in every situation? The answer, of course, is much more so…if only we could trust him.
What Jesus teaches us here in this section of his Sermon is not common human behavior. Daily we see the consequences of how we infringe upon each other’s lives with judgments that are meant to manipulate others into certain actions, rather than making a request. The request honors human dignity; it treats others as they themselves would wish to be treated. A lot of human misery could be done away with if only we could learn this one lesson. It starts with husbands and wives; parents and children; friends and family; co-workers and the like. If only we could treat them as we would wish to be treated, the Bible would not seem so complex after all.
(Don’t forget to join me for A Message from the Heart radio program Sunday evening at 8:00pm on KJAK 92.7FM, or streaming live at www.kjak.com)
(curtisbaker@hotmail.com)
Write to: P.O. Box 157, Slaton, TX 79364
